Mastering Diplomatic Responses: How to Say "None of Your Business" in Chinese
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【Wow Mandarin】shares words/expressions that help you impress the Chinese around you and make you the coolest among your friends. This column introduces short expressions and phrases that can be used without a long and complicated sentence. Despite your level, you can always "Wow" the Chinese when you chat with them fluently.
Let's start !
You have definitely been asked questions about your privacy and surely don't want to bother preparbig a T-shirt to answer. In today's Survival Wow Mandarin, you can learn how to say: "That's irrelevant." Read on to learn how you can fight back against those questions.
In a situation when you purely want to tell someone not to get involved with a good heart, and you have no negative emotions, you can say:
（这件事）和 somebody/something 没关系。
zhè jiàn shì hé somebody/something méi guān xi。
It has nothing to do with _______.
Example:
Kuma: Jamin，这周六你不能来我家是因为要和Mia一起出去玩吗？
（Jamin，zhè zhōu liù nǐ bù néng lái wǒ jiā shì yīn wéi yào hé Mia yī qǐ chū qù wán ma ？）
Kuma: Jamin, are you gonna hang out with Mia this Saturday just so you don't have to come to my place?
Jamin: 不是，和Mia没关系。我们的狗生病了，这周六我妈妈让我带狗去医院。
（bú shì ，hé Mia méi guān xi 。wǒ men de gǒu shēng bìng le ，zhè zhōu liù wǒ mā ma ràng wǒ dài gǒu qù yī yuàn 。）
Jamin: Oh no, it has nothing to do with Mia. Our dog is sick and my mom asked me to take the dog to the hospital this Saturday.
In case you are a bit of offended or unhappy but you want to save everyone's 面子miàn zi（reputation）, you can say:
和 somebody 有关系吗？
hé somebody yǒu guān xi ma？
OR
(这件事)和somebody/something有什么关系?
zhè jiàn shì hé somebody/something yǒu shén me guān xi？
This is a rhetorical question and literately it means:
It has no relationship with __________.
Example:
学生：Jamin老师，对不起，我没有做作业，是我家的猫不好！
（xué shēng：Jamin lǎo shī ，duì bú qǐ ，wǒ méi yǒu zuò zuò yè ，shì wǒ jiā de māo bù hǎo ！）
Student: Teacher Jamin, I‘m sorry I didn't do the homework and it is my cat's fault!
Jamin: 你没有做作业和猫有什么关系? 😏
（nǐ méi yǒu zuò zuò yè hé māo yǒu shí me guān xì ?）
Jamin: How is that a cat's matter? (threatening smile)
Finally if someone really pisses you off and you'd like to shout out "None of your fxxxing business!", here you go:
关 你 屁 事！
guān nǐ pì shì！
Short and sweet, right? 😉
And similarly,
关 我 屁 事
guān wǒ pì shì
What's that have to do with me?
Here 屁 means "fart" so the sentence is a bit unelegant; the alternative is:
关你什么事！and 关我什么事！
关你什么事！and 关我什么事！
guān nǐ shén me shì guān wǒ shén me shì
Example:
（Mia发了一张美丽的自拍）
（when Mia posts a pretty selfie）
网友：你是不是胖了啊，脸怎么这么大？
（wǎng yǒu ：nǐ shì bú shì pàng le a ，liǎn zěn me zhè me dà ？）
a stupid netizen：Are you getting fat? Why is your face so big?
Mia：关你屁事
。
（guān nǐ pì shì！）
Mia: It's none of your fxxking business。
To be continued...
Want to learn more useful(cheeky) answers to protect yourself from other's curiosity? 😈
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Mandarin Mates is a Chinese language school based in Hangzhou, providing Chinese learning services and community activities to local expats. Different from most of the local mandarin schools, Mandarin Mates aims to build a Tight-knit and homely atmosphere community for the local expats. By providing fun and interactive Chinese classes and exciting activities, we help expats to jump out of the "foreigner bubble", integrate into Chinese life, and make China your second home! Fun learning, fun living!
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